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I Stopped Cooking Dinner

One day I stopped cooking dinner. Twenty years of preparing this meal every night left me feeling like I needed a break. So I took it. And I haven’t looked back.

This was not well executed - there were no sub plans in place, no meal or grocery list in sight, no indication of any kind that I would desert my post. Two of 5 kids had graduated High School and were off to college, leaving 3 other extremely capable people at home to run this leg of the race.

Around this same time, I had started my grassroots business My Village Well, and found myself in a creative flow around dinnertime. In some ways, it seemed like a natural transition: lock my bedroom door to build a website, attain a business license, and create spaces where women would share real speak because the 2016 election had left us feeling a little like, “What the F actually just happened?” If you’re not familiar with this, just Google the #metoo movement.

The meals I did continue to prepare, which included chili, pasta, and yummy salads, my family refused to eat. So I was like, “So long suckers.”

One of my daughters unsuccessfully tried to guilt me by using my 8 year old as collateral damage , another daughter started eating peanut butter and jelly on the regular, and my husband just sort of took it in stride, realizing something in me had shifted.

I hated cooking dinner. I never liked it. And now I was reclaiming myself in this dynamic. Thank you Donald Trump.

Here we are, 5 years and some change later, and we are all still standing. I am not proclaiming that you abandon your family like I did. But what I am saying is this: if you are doing something out of obligation that leaves you feeling resentful and weary, let’s figure out a way for you to delegate so you can breathe some beautiful fresh air into your lungs.

As women, we do A LOT of things, often out of feeling like we “have” to because this is what we learned growing up.. I am calling bullshit on that right now. And I will be standing by with snacks and a bullhorn cheering for you as you walk away from your dirty laundry.

** Question to Ponder: What have you delegated to someone else?

** That salad? I made it! Yummy greens, edamame, fresh mozzarella, veggies - just the way I like it. Who wouldn't eat that? My people.

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