I have an accountability partner for journaling because I cannot be trusted to do this work on my own. Today’s prompt was: What Questions Do You Want Answered?
At approximately 7:44 AM, I indicated with certainty: “I don’t have any questions right now. I have found that the more questions I ask, the more I suffer from not knowing.”
Can you believe that bullshit? Yeah, me either. That "clarity" lasted for a mere 8 hours and some change.
Yes actually, I DO have questions:
Why is raising kids so hard?
Why are so many people struggling in our world?
Why can’t we all just get along?
Why aren’t we listening to Mother Earth?
Why are teenage girls so scary?
When will the Catholic Church step up for a woman’s choice and the LGBTQ community?
Why does this all feel so overwhelming?
Why am I really here?
How come I keep fucking it up?
Why don’t I remember I can ask for Divine help?
How come I sometimes forget that God Creator is unconditionally loving and compassionate?
What can I do when someone I love is struggling?
Why does it feel heavy?
How can I help it feel lighter?
Who will carry this burden?
When I feel as though grief has run its course, why do I miss my mom so much?
Where will we retire?
Will my kids ever leave my house?
What is for dinner?
How long will my dog live?
Will I fulfill my purpose while I am here?
How can I be lovable with all of my many imperfections and flaws?
How much money does Oprah really make?
The uncertainty of not knowing takes up residence in my ethos like it’s riding shotgun to a high school football game on a Friday night. Being a human just begs us to ask and question, and want to know the ending.
Spiritual Teacher, Carolyn Myss, says “Some things are not for us to know. They’re just not.” (This best selling author and speaker obviously doesn’t know what she’s talking about:)
If you have questions, I want you to know: me too. I see you.
Sending you Peace in the Unknowing,