While standing in line to purchase groceries just two days ago, I was gob smacked when I realized I don’t have a mom to buy a Mother’s Day card for. It’s been eight years since she has been gone. Grief is a funny thing isn’t it?
Creator, I thank you for granting me two solid years to get to know my mom like a kindred soul…
For playing cards and going to the fabric store
For making her laugh and painting her toes.
For styling her hair and holding her hands before Cancer took her away.
I carefully sift through these memories, filled with thanksgiving and no regrets for words left unspoken.
My dad, now in his eighties, plants one rose bush as a testament for each grand and great grandchild, almost a dozen altogether. An elder Horticulturist if you will, he carefully tends to each as if they are a newborn baby. In the very same yard that was ravaged by fires just a few years ago, these multi-generational rose bushes flourish: beauty for ashes.
He arranges these treasures in vases around his home with the utmost of care until there are no more containers left to fill, just roses spilling over onto every flat surface, taking up residence like tenants who pay rent with their magnificence.
Creator, I thank you for the roses that bloom with unyielding beauty, displaying their splendor without competition but rather a symphony of fragrance, reminding my dad he is a gardener of many things good and Holy.
Thank you for the countless parenting mistakes I have learned from. Raising my voice with my daughters has taught me how to deeply listen without an agenda. Trying to micromanage these fire breathing dragons has shown me how to step back and allow what is to be. Thinking I know better than them has disarmed me into trusting in Your Divine Plan for each …an unending trust fall.
In the largest and smallest of things, I come to You in thanksgiving. When I veer off and head toward the guardrail, Creator, thank you for course correcting me back to gratitude. I am a bit of a mess, but apparently You’re down with that, because You haven’t left me yet.
So let's cue the song: Our God is an Awesome God
or
Holy Spirit You are Welcome Here
or
I Wanna Dance with Somebody by Whitney Houston...because isn't it all really the same thing?
Come on: the dance floor isn't going to fill itself...
Let's Dance,
Michelle