I have been carbo loading lately.
No, I am not training for an intense physical event.
Yes, I am emotionally eating like my life depends on it.
Pita chips, Tortillas crisps with salsa, bread in its entirety. My mind demands, “Get in my belly,” and I do not argue. It seems as though when life hands me bullshit sandwiches, I consume many more beige foods than per usual.
You want to know the most interesting part?
I am not judging myself for it. I refuse to beat myself up. Contrary to our culture’s perfectionistic attitude, I consider this self awareness to be growth.
Seriously, WWJD in this circumstance? I envision him handing me bread (that he made), while sitting across from me with an excellent glass of wine (that he also made) and listening without judgment, coupled with immense compassion.
I have been a bit stressed and I’m eating more pizza than usual. I’m also loving myself through the process utilizing my standard peace practices like hiking with friends, writing and leaning on people I trust. Sometimes I even scream in the car, or pray: lately, both sound oddly similar.
And so if you happen to have an extra something to eat that falls into the carb category that you want to share, come and sit next to me.
We can eat in silence, and I promise not to judge. We will get through this.
I love you, Michelle
* I have found the release valve of writing to be therapeutic in more ways than one. I don't plan what I am going to write about, instead just releasing what's on my heart. That is what happens with each piece you read posted here.
** I would love for you to experience this same type of release in our Pop Up and Write starting next week. No, I am not peddling anything...unless you count listening to your heart.
*** Because I fiercely believe that we ALL have stories and that they matter. Please reach out with any questions. And for goodness sake, bring Pita Chips!